Lumpin' One Shots
by InThatMomentISwear
Summary: A new era of one shots is here for the summer! It'll be updated whenever or when I have writer's block which is usually . You're free to give me prompts/ideas and such you'll be credited..unless you're anon . Thank You! Any pairing I approve of


So I have some explaining to do. Actually I don't. I just have writer's block so I looked up some prompts to get me going.

Sentence: **Her reaction to such a reasonable**** request left him agog.**

Prompt found here:

www. adammaxwell dot com slash writers-tools/writing-prompts-generator/

(It was randomly chosen)

I will begin to put a summary so you aren't blindly thrown into a story, but I can't with this one. It'd give the whole story away.

Disclaimer at end.

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Marshall Lee scouted the club, ignoring the horrible dubstep music with its repetitive beat and idiotic chorus or whatever you called it. Lights of all color graced the dance floor as teenagers grinded on it, sweat and lust dripping from their pores. He _hated_ his job, he _hated_ this pathetic excuse of a club, and he absolutely _loathed_ the people who came here. They were immature, idiotic _children_ who thought they were grown- children who actually lived by "YOLO".

Now, Marshall Lee wasn't some stuck up old hag. He was pretty young, but he matured. Years of mindless sex, drinking, and drugs were now behind him. He grew up and he was very proud of this. He didn't judge these kids because he was just like them once upon a time, but he just wished they'd open their eyes and see how they're wasting their life- something he wish he could've done.

"Hey you, buddy, come here!" some guy with a horrid white Mohawk called out and pointed at Marshall which brought him out of his reverie. "Come here for a sec bartender guy! You don't have anything better to do!" he laughed with his intoxicated friends.

Marshall fought back the urge to roll his eyes but went to him anyways. He forgot to mention that he _hated _guys like these- complete douches. Guys who thought they were better because they were getting served rather than serving. The worst part was that this guy was probably his age, if not older. He understood younger, but older? Really? This guy had no sense of reality. He should've been had that wakeup call that told him to do something with his life.

"How ya doing, heh? Listen here my man, I know this gig doesn't pay that much, so how 'bout I do you a favor and give you an opportunity to make a little extra cash? Here's fifty bucks for a drink to give to the hottie over there. Say it's from me and ask her for a date." He grinned as his friends whooped and nudged him.

What was this? _Fifth grade_? Unable to resist, Marshall actually did roll his eyes at this guy and remarked sarcastically in a fake British accent, "Oh thank you sir, I didn't know how I was going to live without this fifty dollars!"

"No problem bro. I know, I'm too kind." The freak said.

Marshall went to fetch the appropriate bottles to make a drink while grumbling, "Oh yeah, you're way too kind ya weirdo with your stupid little white noodle on your head. Pathetic excuse of hair. This fifty dollars is going to impact my life so much- my mortgage, life insurance, bills…yeah, it's going to pay for all of that."

This guy _really_ thought he was doing him a favor. Psh, in his dreams. Marshall kept glancing at the girl he was making the drink for. Although he hated to admit it, the guy _did_ have good taste. She had a pale complexion with long coal hair. On her skinny body she had on a deep red tunic dress with medium length sleeves that were cut out in the middle, giving you a glimpse at her arms. She would've looked frail if she didn't mean mug everyone. It was obvious that she was a girl with attitude. It was rare that he saw someone worth looking at in this club. She was definitely out of place. She leaned on the bar glaring at the dance floor. She hadn't ordered anything yet and he had never seen her here before making her not an acquaintance of Marshall's. What a great way to greet himself.

Eh, she must not have good taste anyways if she went to this club. Guys were surrounding her, yet her glare was too intimidating leaving them all scared. Marshall looked to see exactly who she was glaring at. It looked as if it was some girl with a skin tight pink mini dress that puffed out in the chest area and a Mexican with a purple sequined bubble dress.

"Hey you, yeah- get back to the drinkie making. What am I paying you for?" Noodle head interrupted. Marshall clutched his teeth, resisting spitting out a crude comeback as his crew laughed.

Marshall got the drink together and was about to make his way to her. He wanted to get this over with because he hated feeling tied to this guy like some dog on a leash. Just didn't fit his style, you know? Well, that was until the guy called him back.

"Wait, wait! You can't just go over there! Looking at you right now tells me that you can't woo a broad. Ash master has to give you some of my game and you better not take credit for it, ya hear?" _Ash_ pointed at Marshall Lee warning him.

"Ash is it?" Marshall thought to himself.

"Huh, let's see…what's a good pick up line? Oh, I know! Come here so I can whisper it to ya. I don't want all these other haters stealin' my swag." Ash leaned over the bar as Marshall stared at him in disgust. After he finished, Marshall wiped his ear and looked at the guy in disgust.

"Really though?" he thought to himself.

"I don't have all night geezer." Ash rushed him.

"Uhh, okay?" Marshall made his way to the woman wondering whether he should laugh or be disgusted.

"Hey." He called trying to get her attention. Her ears perked up indicating to Marshall that she had heard him yet she still didn't turn around. That didn't go well with Marshall Lee at all. "Hey, lady! I know you hear me!" She still didn't turn around causing him to poke her with his free hand all the while looking pissed that he was being ignored. "I'm not going away any time soon so how about you just answer already."

"What?" She quickly turned around her eyes tearing him to pieces. It was ineffective since he looked unamused.

"That guy over there- the one with the white hair? Yeah, well he bought this for you. Excuse me for bringing it to you, but unfortunately I'm a bartender. So yeah, that's kind of my job. Anyways, I was paid to hit on you for him with some cheesy line. What was it again? ….Oh! It was something like 'Hows bout you and me, we get together and do the horizontal mambo?' His words, not mine." Marshall Lee lazily stated with a bored/tortured expression on his face.

"And what exactly is that supposed to mean?" She asked crossing her arms hip cocked to the side.

"I don't know. To fuck?" Marshall Lee yawned.

"Tell him if he comes anywhere near me, I will stick these heels so far up his ass that his intestines will smell like feet."

"What?" Marshall smiled at the lame threat. **Her reaction to such a "**_**reasonable"**_** request left him agog. **"You can do so much better than that."

"You got anything better bartender boy." She challenged sitting down roughly.

"Uh, yeah- tons better." He stated as if that was the easiest question in the world. "You should've said something along the lines of…'Come near me and I'll make you choke on afterbirth.'"

"Dude, that sounds so stupid." She commented. "I ought to punch you in the jugular for that one."

"Bring it honey boo boo child. Don't make me stick fishes down your dress and make it smell like the Great Depression." Marshall warned raising an eyebrow.

"I wish a bitch would-specifically you. I don't see why you mad. So what you were born on a highway? That's where most accidents happen." She replied back.

"Ohh so you got jokes, huh?"

"Yeah, yeah I got jokes. Marceline always packing with jokes." She referred to herself, slyly introducing herself.

"I'm glad those were jokes 'cause for a minute there I thought a man came in here with a red dress on." Marshall Lee stated.

"You dirty." Marceline smiled as she rolled her eyes.

"And you ratchet, but I wasn't going to call you out on it." Marshall smiled back.

"Looks like that guy that sent you over here is getting ticked off." Marceline pointed back causing Marshall to follow with his eyes. He looked as if he was about to blow a fuse with the scowl on his face and the constant tapping of his fingers. He was the only one left at the bar due to his goons on the dance floor.

"Maybe you should go fulfill his request?" Marshall teased.

"Maybe you should go blow a hobo?" Marceline suggested.

"That was _**one**_ time!"

"Really?"

"No. What kind of guy you think I am? That bub set me for life." Marshall rolled his eyes as he pointed towards noodle head. In the back of his mind, Marshall thought that maybe he would see it and it'd reassure him that he was still trying to talk her into going out with him.

"Really? He looks cheap. How much did it take for you to ditch your dignity and put the move on me for him?" Marceline snorted as she took the drink from Marshall's hands.

"Fifty bucks. Give me ten and I'll tell him you said no." Marshall bargained grinning wickedly.

"Uhh, no! I'll just take my drink and you can be on your way Mr. Bartender guy."

"Rude. I'll just go over there and tell him you want the dick." Marshall wiggled his eyebrows. He turned around about to deliver the message until she pulled his arm.

"No you're not."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! No touchie the bartender. That's a five dollar fee." Marshall advised.

"Sell out. What'll twenty get me?" Marceline smiled, holding out twenty.

"A lot- maybe even more than you can handle." Marshall reached for the money but she snatched it away.

"You're not worth it."

"Whatever." Marshall walked away to deliver noodle head's rejection.

"Wait! What's your name?" Marceline asked.

"I'm not worth it, remember?" Marshall grinned as he came face to face with Ash.

"Soooo? What she say?" Ash sneered, upset of how long the bartender took.

"She said she's not interested. Sorry." Marshall Lee replied walking away until he was pulled back once again. Five dollars wasn't going to get it with this guy.

"Maybe if you weren't trying to put your game on her, she'll be sitting on my lap right now." Ash grimaced.

"Maybe if you didn't have such lame pick up lines she would actually have taken you seriously." He pulled his arm out of Ash's grip.

Marceline saw the commotion she started and made her way to the other side of the bar.

"Listen here chump- you're nothing but a worthless bartender. Go fucking make a drink and stop trying to make passes at my girl or else." Ash threatened pointing his index finger in Marshall's face. Marshall rolled his eyes.

Marceline heard this and her eyebrows knitted in confusion. She raised her hand and replied, "Wait- _what?_ Your girl? I don't even know your name." The two men turned to her.

"The name's Ash babe- remember it. You'll be screaming it later." He winked.

"As if." Marshall mumbled.

"'Scuse me water boy? Got something to say? Think you can take on the Ash man?" Ash challenged.

"Dude, why do you talk about yourself in third person?" Marshall yawned not intimidated at all.

"Ass, excuse me, Ash. Guy, you have no chance with me." Marceline clarified to which Marshall laughed. Ash pressed his teeth together and turned towards Marshall.

"Ya think that's funny water boy?" Ash grabbed Marshall by his shirt, pulling him almost over the bar.

"Actually, I think it's frickin' hilarious." Marshall clarified.

"I'll show ya something hilarious." Ash threatened. His crew, tired of dancing, came back and watched the soon to be fight.

"No, I'll show _you_ something hilarious." Marshall glared at him.

"Oh really? What is that?" Ash smirked.

"Finn, Jake, come handle these foos!" Marshall raised one of his arms and pushed Ash off of him.

"Why you little- Get off of me!" Ash exclaimed as the tall blonde and short buff red head body guards man handled him and escorted him out of the club. "You little punk! Can't even fight me yourself!"

Marshall Lee dusted off the invisible dirt and went back to the bar.

"Should I say sorry or?" Marceline walked back up to Marshall.

"Eh, all in a night's worth." Marshall Lee said offhandedly.

"All of this happens in a night?" Marceline asked sitting down.

"Yeah, give or take." Marshall grabbed a cloth and wiped down the bar. "Some guy thinks he can take on the world and someone has to put him in his place."

"Yeah…" Marceline dragged out.

"What?" Marshall looked up.

"Why didn't _you_ put him in his place?" Marceline questioned.

"Because he wasn't worth it." Marshall grinned, going back to scrubbing.

"Marceline, you ready to go?" Her pink friend asked. The purple one looked at Marshall and winked.

"I don't know. You wanna come?" Marceline asked ignoring the foolishness of the question.

"I work here. I'm not off yet." Marshall smiled. "Go ahead leave. Maybe if I'm really worth it, we'll meet again."

"Heyy papi! Me llamo Lucia. Como te llamas? A quien le importa? De cualquier manera usted puede conseguirlo!" Her purple friend said. [Translation: Oh Daddy! My name is Lucia. What is your name? Who cares? Either way you can get it!]

"Lucia, that's just…distasteful." Marceline's pink friend commented.

"I don't know what you said mami, but I think you're a little drunk." Marshall laughed as Marceline rolled her eyes.

"I said you could get it whenever you want it, where ever you want it, and however you want it." Lucia said in English rolling her tongue.

"Ignore her. Anyways bye…?" Marceline said getting up hoping he'll help her finish her farewell with his name.

"Am I worth it now?" Marshall raised an eyebrow.

"Just shut up and tell me your name." Marceline smiled. Her pink friend kept glancing between Marshall Lee and Marceline.

"My name is Marshall- Marshall Lee."

"See ya later Marshall Lee."

"Maybe or maybe not." He replied as she left. Her pink friend kept nudging Marceline as Lucia kept talking about how sexy Marshall was.

"If she looks back, she totally digs you bruh." Marshall said to himself as his eyes followed her to the exit. Low and behold, she looked back. He grinned as he got back to work.

_Later that night…_

"Why do I always have to lock up?" Marshall grumbled to himself as he locked the back door of the club that he absolutely despised. He put the keys and walked towards his sexy red and white 1972 Oldsmobile 442 Convertible. He loved that car more than life.

"Hey." A voice called causing Marshall to have a mini heart attack. He put a hand on his chest and called out,

"Who's there!"

"Me idiot." Marceline walked from out of the shadows. "You really think I was going to let you go that easy."

"You waited outside for me? Dang ma, you sprung." Marshall smiled.

"Boy please. I just-I. Shut up and take me home." Marceline huffed as she crossed her arms.

"Not with that stale attitude. Don't you got a ride?" Marshall replied giving her his "stank" face.

"Nope. So would you really leave me out here looking like this all alone?" Marceline pouted.

"I guess not. You might get arrested for prostitution." Marshall laughed at her face.

"Shut up. It's cold!" Marceline commented.

He got into his car and unlocked the doors for Marceline to get in.

"So why did you wait up?" Marshall asked.

"I didn't. Bonnie brought me back here not too long ago." Marceline grinned.

"Ugh, you ruined the moment. Well, why did you come back?" Marshall asked, hoping she would admit it. She gave him a look and pursed her lips. "Go ahead and say it."

"Fine. I came back 'cause you worth it." Marceline smiled. "Now take me home."

"Which one? Mine or yours?" Marshall Lee winked.

"Nuh uh. You ain't worth all of that. Take me home boy!" she demanded as he laughed.

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So do you like it/hate it?

In case you're wondering, I'm having a writer's block on Roomies. I forgot what was going to happen D:

Do not fret just yet! I'll think of something...soon!

**Disclaimer: I don't nor have I ever owned Adventure Time or its characters, a 1972 Oldsmobile 442 Convertible (which I googled due to my lack of knowledge on cars), or the jokes. I'm unoriginal. I just googled stuff.**

**Review if you wanna. **


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